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Secrets of Successful Slackers

Need to look busier?

Make sure your office appears swamped at all times.  Your desk should always look like you’re in the midst of some incredibly time-sensitive project.  This way you can safely maximize the time you spend from your office, goofing off.

For added protection, make sure the papers on your desk are arranged in stakcs. Merely scattering them about will not do – this suggests disorganization.  A calculator, a few stray apples and a strategically placed pair of eyeglasses will round out the organized chaos effect.

Finally, some work on your computer screen and a carefully placed sandwich remnant, preferably in a wrapper, will do much to enhance your office’s overall ambiance.  Not only do you appear to eat lunch at your desk, but you also seem too busy to finish it or even remember to throw it away.  Be sure to replace it with a new, freshly chewed sandwich every few days, though, or folks – and insects – may start to catch on.

– Brian Harris and Rich Herschlag